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bigghimself t1_ja8o2oa wrote

How do they pay for it?

In bills. Ha!

684

wing_ding4 t1_ja8rdxr wrote

We have pet ducks and calm them qwackheads

1

rxricks t1_ja8t2mv wrote

Duck walks into a pharmacy to get some chapstick. He says "Put it on my bill".

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SeredW t1_ja90ps1 wrote

So, the same stuff as Barry Kripke.

1

parappadarapp t1_ja94rtg wrote

What is an British guys favorite thing to do?

Crack Croquet.

1

irrelevantAF t1_ja9lks3 wrote

I read this in the voice of Barry Kripke from The Big Bang Theory - is that about right?

1

sideburns28 t1_ja9ms3j wrote

My girlfriend only hears ‘quack quack’ when listening to ‘Crack Rock’ by Frank Ocean

1

Hobbes_87 t1_ja9q5dt wrote

Anything they can snort through a bill.

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DaRush t1_ja9qiqi wrote

Ducks do shit out drugs

−1

h0nkyJ t1_ja9tuc8 wrote

This sounds like it should be printed on a 5% ABV Popcicle's stick.

3

morthos97 t1_ja9uld9 wrote

Hahahhahahaahha this is the first joke I guessed on this sub before I clicked! Proud moment. Although I was thinking quack rock

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GTAdriver01 t1_jaa5rwa wrote

What do ducks eat with their soup?

Quackers

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MoronTheBall t1_jaagtcn wrote

Maybe this explains why Donald Duck never wore pants

0

physco219 t1_jaaklax wrote

Oh, I figured whatever it was they just called it "Duck Sauce" or something.

1

iyasareru t1_jaar370 wrote

A duck goes to a love motel in Tokyo. A little while in, he orders room service, some more booze and some toys. Later he phones up the front desk requesting a dozen condoms. The lady behind the front desk obliges and say she’ll put in on his bill. The duck screams “ better not… l’m suffocate!!!!”

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Ok_Yam_8047 t1_jaasnmq wrote

They smoke that Skooma. The yellow skittles

1

Ookachucka t1_jaatmq7 wrote

Before I look, Im just gonna guess.

Quack cocaine.

​

knew it. still a good joke

0

BelicoU t1_jaazlhn wrote

Heisenberg crystal blue is my guess

1

Guuhatsu t1_jaaztli wrote

The only factoid I know about ducks is that their favorite snack is cheese and quackers.

1

tycr0 t1_jab5csh wrote

The one I gave lsd to def did lsd.

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wholesomechunk t1_jabsa1k wrote

I used to do ducks, I still do, but I used to, too.

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radiogeekau t1_jabxx6u wrote

Goddammit! I laughed at that so hard! Take my damn upvote!!

1

swapra t1_jac0v7p wrote

Quack cocaine, I mean come on people xD!

1

deceze t1_jac964x wrote

But how much drugs would some ducks do do if some ducks could do some drugs?

1

hometownshame t1_jaceu33 wrote

Whatever the duck wants.

Maybe only iPhone users will get this.

1

Inevitable_Block6913 t1_jad2b6j wrote

"it appears that you have 'anatataphobia' which is a fear of being watched by ducks, I suggest you go buy many loaves of bread and feed the ducks, feed ALL the ducks, FEED THEM!"

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reidzen t1_jad45kd wrote

Seven words in your joke and you still managed to misspell 'quack'

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cherryhilljawnz t1_jad474s wrote

I thought they make quack and afterwards they get all quacked out

1