North Side Post Office and "Clerk 14"

Submitted by CptJaxxParrow t3_y7x5nr in rva

I had to mail a package today, a relatively simple task that became increasingly more bizarre by the minute when I met "Clerk 14" at The Richmond Northside Post Office. My transaction began with him posing a very profound philosophical question; "Why don't bitches want dick anymore?"

Unfortunately, by the time this question was asked, he had my package behind the bullet proof glass and declined to return it to me when I asked, so there was no backing out and going somewhere else. He did, however, have an answer for his question: "Bitches dont want dick anymore because of orgys."

As he slowly continued my transaction, he began outlining the fall of the Roman empire being related to their acceptance of "homo intent". He could clearly see my disinterest in the conversation, but decided that would be the perfect time to launch into an incoherent, homophobic rant. Both the payment terminal and I waited for the cashier to finish his thesis on "the homos," attempting to cut him off but being told to "respect my elders."

After 10 minutes, my payment was processed, and I heard the sweet musical tone of my receipt printing. For some unknown reason, before the receipt was in my hand, I decided to inform Clerk 14 that I'm bisexual and express my distaste for the situation [hagrid-shouldnthavesaidthat.gif]. Now my receipt is held hostage, and I have added another 5 agonizing minutes to what I assume at this point is a fever dream. He finally slips the receipt through the mail slot and as I leave, he yells some prophetic warning to me like an old man in a horror film telling teenagers not to visit Camp Murder.

The google reviews for this post office are all talking about this one guy, with similarly strange experiences, who is apparently the only one that works at this location for the past SIX YEARS!

Who are you, Clerk 14?

Why are you doing this?

How have you not been fired?

Will my package make it to its destination?

339

Comments

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skeevy-stevie t1_isx48lj wrote

Gotta say, I didn’t expect orgys to be the answer.

166

ninjapro t1_isxa99m wrote

People don't want sex anymore because they are having way more sex. 🤔

56

misfit9999999999999 t1_isxm203 wrote

https://www.buzzfeed.com/daily/gen-z-having-less-sex-than-previous-generations

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ninjapro t1_isxm7h8 wrote

I'm aware of the statistics behind this. I'm saying that Clerk 14's reasoning on why this is is completely nonsensical.

14

[deleted] t1_isyallm wrote

[deleted]

1

ninjapro t1_isyc2vq wrote

Could be. I was thinking that it was a "women don't want to settle down with nice guys like me; they'd rather just sleep around", but that doesn't quite fit with his use of the phrase "Bitches dont want dick".

Then I thought that the "acceptance of homo intent" thing might mean he thinks that women are turning gay and don't "want dick" because of that.

That being said, I don't blame OP for not asking for more details on their thought process. Lol

3

CptJaxxParrow OP t1_isycr2r wrote

I got too many incoherent details as it is, and I didn't even want those.

3

TheDizDude t1_isxhgqr wrote

Orgy is always the answer, no matter the question.

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CyranoDeBurlapSack t1_isy62z1 wrote

Why are there no hummingbirds feeding on the sweet nectar I’ve left out for them?

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skeevy-stevie t1_isxi5mc wrote

Orgys, good wordle word.

4

MydogisaToelicker t1_isxjdsy wrote

Just tried - it didn't accept that word.

Clerk 14 may have more power than we think.

6

skeevy-stevie t1_isxk6tt wrote

I also tried right after this, no luck.

3

jennbo t1_isxl202 wrote

It’s spelled “orgies!”

Love, your local polyamorous writer/editor

12

judgementalb t1_isysru6 wrote

Well, how else are the women gonna see that sexing other women is possible? Surely, no one just sits around dwelling on the possibility of same-sex relationships and spouting off their opinion to every passerby.

/s

1

eightbitagent t1_iswxgaw wrote

Call the postmaster

97

freetimerva t1_isxdkgq wrote

Can a person actually get fired from the postal service?

My old mail man got caught stealing christmas cards for the cash in them...and they just moved him to role where he didnt have access to mail.

40

DefaultSubsAreTerrib t1_isxnab2 wrote

By extension, maybe they would move Clerk 14 to a role where he doesn't interact with other humans.

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NuttingOnNutzy t1_isy4siu wrote

The post office probably moved him to that branch, making him work alone so other postal employees and management don’t have to deal with him

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kilofoxtrotfour t1_isxgl75 wrote

Postal Employees are almost impossible to fire, unfortunately

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Stitchmond t1_isxhtv8 wrote

Then how come I see a different carrier on my route every other week? I'm worried about these people who I see regularly but then are simply gone. Do they just take them out back and shoot them?

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kilofoxtrotfour t1_isxke70 wrote

The USPS is much more dynamic now. A decade ago, the mail was delivered on the exact same route. about the same time, and usually the same employee.! Now, a USPs truck might be passing your house 3 times a day because of their multiple contracts with the private sector. The USPS employee was the dream job until recently— it’s a $hitty job with goos pay/benefits right now.

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Stitchmond t1_isxn6kl wrote

I remember when I was a kid in a mid-sized town, our carrier was one older guy for like 15 years.

Now I've seen the same young girl delivering mail for the past few weeks, which is the longest I've ever seen the same carrier. There have been times when it's been a different carrier every day for weeks at a time.

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freetimerva t1_isxkal1 wrote

>Do they just take them out back and shoot them?

If they're lucky.

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NuttingOnNutzy t1_isy5eaj wrote

The post office has a probationary period where they essentially try to torture you into quitting by giving you terrible routes, shifts, etc. You do another probationary period once you get accepted into a career role. Once you prove you can consistently show up to work in hell, then the protections come into play that USPS is known for.

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gleepgloopgleepgloop t1_isxcqx6 wrote

Sounds like the clerk has schizophrenia and is having a break or maybe stop taking his medication. He may be able to hold it together when his postmaster is standing at his shoulder, but not all day long. The postmaster probably knows something is up but needs to catch something like this in person or have a complaint filed (Not an online review).

Managers worst nightmare. Write a letter to the postmaster about your experience so it's in writing. You'll be doing everybody a favor.

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jennbo t1_isxlg0b wrote

Man I know folks (usually without MDs) like to do armchair diagnoses online but saying that someone has schizophrenia because they say bigoted shit is a big stretch imo. There are plenty of people who have mental illnesses who aren’t assholes. A “break” for 6+ years if you read the google reviews. And supposedly he IS the main manager there.

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gleepgloopgleepgloop t1_isxoy4a wrote

I am a licensed mental health professional and have experience working with institutionalized and community-residing individuals with schizophrenia, among other disorders.

You are focused on the bigoted comments, I'm looking at all the details and the context, which includes my knowledge of federal HR and ADA where it pertains to employee mental health.

Of course I don't have enough information to make a diagnosis, which is why I said it "sounds like" schizophrenia. I rarely comment on diagnoses on reddit, but if OP's description is accurate, I stand by my impression.

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LionOver t1_isy6j2s wrote

Yeah, my older brother has schizoaffective disorder and one of his primary delusions over the past several years is that black people are following him and listening to his conversations. It's verrrrrry embarrassing, because you can't make him unbelieve that.

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gleepgloopgleepgloop t1_isydl73 wrote

I bet it is! I'm sorry your brother is struggling and that it's affecting you as well. It's nice that you have a relationship with him despite it.

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CptJaxxParrow OP t1_it1ri5p wrote

Nah, I know people with schizoaffective disorders, some on their meds, other's not so much. This seems nothing like that. Clerk 14 is an energy vampire. He was very outwardly enjoying making me uncomfortable and confused. Dudes just looking for confrontation to entertain himself

2

DefaultSubsAreTerrib t1_isx6vew wrote

>"respect to my elders."

Sounds like he has started an arms race. Next time you need to bring an even older person to tell him to shut up.

80

tRillVA t1_isypmky wrote

I encountered a similar situation at the Broad St Lowes the other weekend when an older guy was berating this cashier who couldn't have been more than 20 for not letting him have like 15 free flags. He was waiving some piece of paper around proclaiming it was a government document that allowed veterans to have free flags. The kid was actually just trying to call his manager as he had no idea what this dude was referring to, nor did I. He tried to make it a racial thing (he was black and the kid was white) , falsely stating that he was being wrongfully profiled and said he would only cut him some slack because he was young. He also kept telling everyone not to let his nice shoes fool them, alluding to the fact that his would whip some ass if he had to in order to get his way.

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scottafol t1_isxdfag wrote

I assume this is the same maniac that’s been there forever. He came out from behind the glass and chased me out once. I had apparently put the wrong type of postage on my bubble mailer, he told me it was wrong, wouldn’t give it back to me and just kept telling me “they are gonna charge you more!” Wouldn’t specify who “they” were. I must have asked him 5 times if my package would be shipped and arrive as it’s currently labeled. He finally said yes. Told him thanks and that he didn’t need to be an ass about it. Man holy shit he did not like that.

He also made all the women at my former job so uncomfortable they all refused to drop packages off. We would go to the big one on brook instead of that office, and it was right across the street.

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Woodsman1993 t1_isxjv91 wrote

Damn. I sure hope they didn’t charge you more.

On the real tho, this guy seems like a menace.

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underwaterpizza t1_isxt7qc wrote

I lived walking distance from that PO.

Still drove to the one on brook. They were actually pretty nice there, except for one guy.

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CptJaxxParrow OP t1_iszuavy wrote

I live right down the street and ususally go to Brook too, having heard the stories about the northside PO. I was lazy yesterday though, and thought its just dropping off a package, the rumors must be exaggerated, it cant be that bad. Turns out the rumors undersold it and its way worse

5

fr0bert t1_isxg9ju wrote

This guy is a fucking asshole. I had a stand up argument with him over shipping a vinyl lp internationally, he told me it wasn't big enough to affix a customs label too and needed to go in a bigger box and refused to take it from me. Even though I'd told him I had done it half a dozen times at that stage. he couldn't be bothered, or didn't know how to do the process and I told him he was lying. I ended up driving over to Brook Rd where I normally went anyway and mentioned it to the clerk who rolled her eyes. I'd wager this guy is very well known.

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goingtocalifornia__ t1_iszhwj3 wrote

So is it really hard to get fired from USPS or something..?

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butterballedcarrots t1_iszqx8k wrote

It's a government agency. It's hard to be fired from government jobs.

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StillFaithlessness50 t1_it02nzc wrote

If enough people fill out a complaint card, something willl be done about him. He won’t get fired, but will be reassigned. I’ve been a carrier for 27 years and I’ve noticed that quite a few window clerks get burnt out and weird after a while.

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ChanceLover t1_it081jx wrote

It's a government job and they are also union employees, it requires divine intervention to get someone fired.

2

FiveTicketRide t1_isxb5ew wrote

Wow I have just read the Google reviews and I now want to go witness this for myself. I will probably regret it but.

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scottafol t1_isxdqvy wrote

I still have the number 1 review! Woohoo!

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wet_beefy_fartz t1_isxirxl wrote

This comment was a JOURNEY. Lord almighty.

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bmrobin t1_isxco3v wrote

i’ve had awful experiences with that guy. no clue how he has managed to stay employed. after 3 such incidents i just started driving over to Brook Rd instead of walking to that one because of that employee.

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someguyinbk t1_iswzq2g wrote

God its fucking bad in there

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salawm t1_isxbik8 wrote

Clerks 3 is about to get greenlit

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[deleted] t1_isxeiaw wrote

[deleted]

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bongcrusher666 t1_isydom9 wrote

There is no fucking way i will ever watch that movie

−5

WEGCjake t1_isx21nk wrote

Is the Northside Post Office the one on Wilmer at Chamberlayne? I rarely go to that one, even though it’s my Zip-code PO. I go the the biggun on Brook @ School. Always a good time there.

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CptJaxxParrow OP t1_isx2c2p wrote

The one on North Ave and Brooklyn Park

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[deleted] t1_isxgmqd wrote

[deleted]

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Woodsman1993 t1_isxi962 wrote

The one on brook (near the new discount store) is super nice as well if you haven’t been. Not a great selection but the people are awesome.

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Woodsman1993 t1_isxdt21 wrote

I was about to ask this ! The one on Chamberlayne is a lil weird but I really like it. It’s generally fast and the main clerk is nice enough. Nothing like the nightmare op experienced.

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Farmerjoerva t1_isx8q71 wrote

Oh no there’s a female that works there with braids. She’s nice. I’m pretty sure this is on Brooklyn pkway

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Woodsman1993 t1_isxdwd4 wrote

I have seen her put up with some absurd people with a very pleasant attitude hahaha I like that post office.

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lady_lowercase t1_isxgob1 wrote

> a female

wait, is she a human? or is this one of those francine at lowe’s situations? because if it’s the latter, i must see pictures.

i’ll just leave this here.

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Farmerjoerva t1_isxi60s wrote

More just distinguishing that the person that works there isn’t the homophonic male that this post is about.

5

WEGCjake t1_isy4397 wrote

r/MenandFemales

1

lady_lowercase t1_isy6980 wrote

eh, based on the other comment, looks like farmer joe is just too used to being among his livestock.

−1

smarshall561 t1_isx5cqc wrote

There is absolutely zero accountability at USPS. Call everyone, nothing will change.

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5252_rpm t1_isxek5c wrote

I’ve had issues with a USPS employee (not this guy) in the past, and even phoned in a few complaints about him. The third time I called, they said “that’s strange, we’ve never had any complaints about him.” MOTHER FUCKER, I JUST TALKED TO YOU LAST WEEK ABOUT HIM!

They surely don’t give any shits.

15

Black9292 t1_isxaon8 wrote

This unfortunately very true. And I’ve lived in the Meadowbrook area before. Nothing gets done. They absolutely do not care.

3

GaimanitePkat t1_iszakxd wrote

I was just there trying to get a refund for $71 worth of international shipping that was returned to me four and a half months later.

There was a woman there complaining about how a mail carrier had been swerving all over her street and drove through her lawn. Apparently there is no way of telling which employee that could have been (there are 3 options) and there's pretty much nothing they will do about it.

2

justbecauseiluvthis t1_isxf1d6 wrote

This sounds like something that should be video recorded, and then posted.

I'm not usually about that, but if this many people have a problem with the clerk that they're not even going to it when they are across the street from it, and it's obviously a huge issue.

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fractalflatulence t1_isxu99g wrote

"How have you not been fired?"

uhhh.... he works for the government.

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fluufhead t1_isxk6m1 wrote

It's a psy-op. Dude is clearly a Koch bros agent planted there to instigate support for privatization.

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rva_obx t1_iszk3g8 wrote

Honestly it sounds like the only thing that would help would be a news report on it. If someone was able to get a video to send in and/or enough people wrote the tip line, it could help get the ball moving.

If the news were to air a video of his conversation with OP…USPS would have to acknowledge it in some way. That would be a fireable offense anywhere else.

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CptJaxxParrow OP t1_iszn66g wrote

There's definitely cameras in there. I don't know if they're recording audio though

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rva_obx t1_iszo2y7 wrote

That’s a good point, I hadn’t thought of surveillance cameras. I was thinking more of a “sting operation” though…someone interact with him while recording it then send it to one of the local news stations. It wouldn’t even have to be a set up…just someone already going there to mail a package since he acts this way to everyone.

3

Pdksays t1_isxuvjf wrote

I’ve had to deal with this moron repeatedly, the only thing I don’t miss after moving out of north side is not being able to use the post office 2 blocks from my house for fear of dealing with this giant pile.

7

vtbeavens t1_isy4z24 wrote

I am all for reading a thread filled with horror stories of Clerk 14 - this is great (but sorry yall gotta deal with that).

7

FalloutRip t1_isx9w0z wrote

I don’t know if clerks cover at other usps locations but I whitenessed a similar conversation at the church hill post office last year. It was some weird combination of trying to hit on and sharing weird and unnecessary and uncomfortable thoughts with the patron ahead of me.

At this point I just go to the central post office and use the self-service kiosk in there.

6

Stitchmond t1_isxid3i wrote

I didn't know that office was even open. They don't have hours posted, every time I've gone by, the door's locked; I never totally trust the blue streetside boxes to get my mail out.

4

lostspyder t1_isxl349 wrote

I mean, it sounds like this could all be solved if he just found some dudes who want dick. Ezpz.

4

finalphasepm t1_iszp6fc wrote

Clerk 14 is wild. Everytime I go in there, something weird and not normal happens. EVERYTIME!!

3

TripleAWingingIt t1_it0d4pq wrote

Remember the question about what character everyone in Richmond knows?

This guy. This is the Guy everyone knows in the city. Clerk 14.

(dying laughing!)

3

foodlion t1_it3zmlf wrote

Oh yea, I accidentally bought bbq turkey out of his trunk one time. I couldn't really understand what he was saying from behind the glass, so I was just sort of amicably agreeing with him, hoping to get my boxes mailed sooner, and next thing I know he's like, "come on out, it's in my trunk, I'll show you". So I follow him outside like wtf is going to be in the trunk. So he pulls out a tupperware container and I'm like, ok it's fucking bbq. He opens it and tells me to try it and I do, and he's like, that'll be $10.

3

lazerlass t1_isxmddd wrote

The post office is one of the few places that is in place to employ the mentally I’ll and previously incarcerated. It’s really hard to fire them because it’s the shittiest job and no one wants to work for USPS. For the most part, the workers are fine. But every once and a while, you get one of these gems.

2

dreww4546 t1_isxupze wrote

You may actually want to write your congressman. I know that one of them has been on the warpath with the postal system for a couple of years now.

1

BurkeyTurger t1_isxxpu1 wrote

Sounds like low hanging fruit for any auditor that wants content.

1

PimmentoChode t1_isyxk86 wrote

Did you need him to specify it was a bisexual orgy?

−2

tarhuntah t1_isyic0g wrote

He is obviously an incel.

−5